Dazzled

I walked down the barn aisle towards Sonita's stall. I ducked my head and tried not to look like a dork as Todd Bergen walked the opposite direction. Todd Bergen is pretty hot.

He nodded, I nodded, I'm sure he didn't get weak kneed like I did.

The girls had been running around like crazy things getting the big names to sign their NRCHA catalogs. It was pretty cool, the trainers were tickled to be asked for an autograph and most of them liked being raised to rock-star status by a couple of kids at their first World Show.

Even Carol Rose cracked a dusty smile when the kids asked her to sign her name across her ad for Shining Spark.

This was also a pretty slick political maneuver, my kids were getting to know some pretty influential people and I was getting nods from Todd Bergen. The Big K had lit up like a Christmas tree when they asked him to sign their programs. He couldn't help but be caught up in their giddy excitement.

I leaned into Sonita's stall. She stood with her head in the corner farthest from the door. It was her usual spot in a show stall, buried as far from the 24 hour a day lights and the clamor of an unknown showgrounds as she could get.

I slipped in the door and checked her yellow buckets. She had drank from both since I had refilled them that morning. My hand slid across her shoulder and down to the scar on her foreleg. She stood quietly while I massaged the papery skin stretched across the terrible old wound. I wrapped my other arm over her back and rested my cheek against her side. The course fabric of her sheet crackled faintly in time with her breathing.

Sonita's heart thumped a slow steady beat and she lipped the back of my head, sometimes her teeth would barely scrape along my scalp as I dug my fingers deep into the muscle surrounding her scar.

This ritual between us, the deep massage I gave her forearm before every major run, had become as important as te lengthy warm-up we had waiting for us.

My anxiety would slip away as she settled under my hand, my heart would slow and in my mind, we would go through a perfect run. I imagined our minds were connected and I was feeding her a winning go.

I savored the rare moment of quiet with my big volatile mare. It wasn't often we admitted our friendship.

I ran my hand down her legs. They were cool to the touch and the bones felt smooth and strong.

I stood and stretched, my back crackled and clenched just a little, the crappy motel beds were beginning to leave their mark.

Sonita moved around, restless as I unbuckled her sheet, she stuck her head out the door and whinnied. Normally this would bring a reprimand, she was supposed to be still, but I didn't have the heart for it.

I slid the sheet over her head and hung it on the door. As I slipped her halter on Sonita hung her lip over my nose, slobbering me up and steaming my glasses.

"C'mon now, we've got work to do," I told her and pushed her face away.

Her eye rolled back to me, merry at the joke, and she backed away, waiting politely for me to leave the stall first.

I saddled her quickly, my tack had been checked over hundreds of times in nervous anticipation. I double checked her front boots and made sure my skid boots were buckled onto the rings of my back cinch.

I dropped her halter and she raised her head high, looking towards the arena. Sonita snorted hard, once, twice and then lowered her head for the bit.

I slipped the big bit between her teeth, she grabbed at it and began to work the roller. She kept her head low as I clipped her romels to the rein chains.

I grabbed my chaps and tossed them across the back of the saddle, I was going to need help getting them on, my hands were beginning to shake.

Sonita leaned forward as I mounted, but held still until I swung my leg over. She hesitated one second more as my foot caught the off stirrup.

We walked toward the arena, my stomach began to tighten and Sonita tossed her head, making the rein chains swing.

I leaned down and stroked her neck. A nervous sweat had already started to freckle her coat.

"It's OK Sonita," I whispered to her, "This could be the last run."

When this is over you're not mine anymore, I thought, so this time, it's just about us.

"We're going to have a good time," I told her.

She began to quiet under my hand. I straightened as we came to the gate and hung my chaps on the fence. There would be time to struggle into them later, we had a good two hours before we showed.

We rode into the bright lights of the warm-up pen and I realised my stomach had calmed. The Big K loped past and flashed a smile at me. It felt good having him here. He wouldn't go until the next day.

As we stood in the middle and I sat back to send her out into her first set of circles, I understood just about everything was good. Sonita and I were going to compete today at the NRCHA World Show.

Sonita loped off quiet, working her roller in 3/4 time..