It's Been a Year Today...

If I hadn't started cataloguing the blog I would never have realized today is an anniversary of sorts. It was a year ago today I started to blog.

To tell the truth, on April 9, 2008, I had no idea what a blog was. I liked reading Fugly and realised I could voice my opinions too.

I also wanted to write. I have always wanted to write, I dreamed of children's books to go along with my artwork from the first time I opened "Where the Wild Things Are." I wanted to take a writing course at the local college, but it was clearly pointed out by my other half that we didn't have the money to spend on an indulgence like a writing class.

So, I started Mugwump Chronicles. I figured I could practice my writing, maybe get a few people to read and discuss horses with me and not spend any $$. This blog helped me realize the change in course my life needed to take and got me job as a writer. Self indulgent my butt.

My life hasn't taken me in any easy directions. I have struggled to pay my way my entire life. Mostly because my career choices involved horses, art and now writing.
Because of these crazy jobs, I also supplemented my income by by being a waitress and bartender off and on through most of my 20's and 30's.

I've never broken into the "big time" in any of my jobs. I would manage to keep food on the table and pay my bills, but nothing more. Well, I had a brief stint as a restaurant manager, so I was succeeding there. Of course as soon as I realized what was happening I ran screaming into the night.

Because I have had a single thread direct my course through every job change, every chased dream and every faded deer trail I've decided to follow.

Horses. My entire life I have breathed them in with every breath. I hear their hoof beats drum through my mind every time I am stressed beyond my personal control. I can slow my heart beat by slowing the horses I hear in my head. Although I often can't reconcile my own situation, I can always slow my physical symptoms by soothing the horse whose hoof beats match the pounding of my heart.

Like a tight jawed horse who licks her lips and relaxes only because I stuck my fingers in her mouth, I feel better because of the physical response and can think out my problems. Crazy, huh?

A good friend came with me to Alamosa when I did my Blue Allan interview. On the way home we were talking the tired, idle talk that happens on the long drive home at the end of a trip.

"Kevin (her husband) and I were talking about a musician friend of his, " Kathy said.
"He has been playing music his entire life. Sometimes he was so broke he would talk the bar manager into letting him sleep under the pool tables for the duration of the gig.
"Now he is pretty successful. But it's been really hard on him.
"He said it's because his music is his passion. It has been the single focus of his entire life, to play music. Then he said the music was stronger than he was."

"He's lucky to have that passion,"I said.

"Kevin said he finally understands you. Your whole life has been geared toward having horses in it. No matter what you do it always evolves around being able to keep your horses.
"He realized you were the only other person we know driven by a passion stronger than you are yourself."

I've been thinking about that one. I guess it's true. I didn't become a trainer just because of a driving desire to train. I actually became a trainer so I could keep my horses. I was a waitress so I could have time to ride my horses. As an artist I drew them and now as a writer I write about them.

So this blog is the best. Because I get to write about horses with and to people as passionate about them as I am. How lucky am I?

I've been rereading my posts as I put them in order. It's funny. When I was still working and training I wrote with the Eastern Plains twang I know so well. I had no clue I was doing it but I can hear it as I read my older posts.

Now my writing is becoming more "suburban". I can't hear the twang anymore. It's a little sad. But as long as I can still talk "horse" I guess I don't mind if my literary accent fades away.

Especially if I can keep talking horse with you guys.